ציטירנדיקער פּירוש אויף מלכים א 1:6

...In this verse, King Solomon, of blessed memory, teaches the virtue of accepting reproof and criticism. Torah depends on one’s ability to accept reproof. The highest virtue is found in the one who accepts criticism and listens to the one who rebukes him. It is the basis for the fulfillment of the Torah. One who rejects reproof is marked by a repulsive virtue containing the worst evils. To reject criticism causes one to reject the yoke of the commandments. Regarding this, Solomon wrote: "Discipline is worse than the one who abandons God's way; he who hates rebuke will die." (Prov. 15:10) This means that one who rejects reproof is worse than the person who abandons the observance of Torah since such a person is guilty of denying the yoke of commandments. A person who abandons the path of Torah may face punishment but he is not condemned to death. One who rejects reproof is not pardoned through suffering but is sentenced to death. This is what King Solomon meant when he said, "He who hates rebuke will die." It is not enough for him to face painful suffering as a judgment…Conversely, Solomon explains that reproof is like a thing of beauty just as earrings are adornments to the body. When a wise person presents criticism to a person who is receptive to the criticism, the criticism is compared to an earring or an adornment which beautifies the soul of the individual. There are two types of people with regard to reproof: those whom we are obligated to criticize and those whom we should avoid criticizing. There are three types of people whom one is obligated to criticize: the wise, the simple and the youth. There are three types of people to whom one should avoid offering reproof: scoffers, fools and the wicked. Regarding scoffers, we are taught, "Do not rebuke the scoffer for he will hate you." (Prov. 9:8) … Regarding fools, it is written, "Do not speak to the fool for he will disdain your sensible words." (Prov. 23:9) The scoffer hates the person who criticizes him while the fool makes light of the words of reproof and mocks the person who is wiser than they are. Regarding the wicked, it is stated, "…to rebuke the wicked person for his blemish is to call down abuse on oneself." (Prov. 9:7) This means that when one criticizes the wicked and points out his blemish, the wicked responds by casting his own blemish back on the one who rebuked him. The people to whom one should offer reproof include the wise. It is written, "Reprove the wise person and he will love you." (Prov. 9:8) Sometimes a wise person needs to be criticized when he accidently sins or does so by chance. Regarding the simple, it is written, "Endow the simple with shrewdness." (Prov. 1:4) Regarding the young, Scripture states "(He endows) the young with knowledge and foresight." (ibid) The most important type of reproof is the criticism offered to the young since their intellect is not fully developed and they lived under the domination of the evil inclination for the thirteen years when their thoughts and understanding were completely focused on worldly pleasures of the body. While they are still adolescents and their nature is malleable, young people are in need of criticism to rein in their behavior and to help them come under the control of their good inclination. They gain this by listening to the person who reproves them and by paying attention to words of Torah which is entirely reproof. It is written, "The way to life is the rebuke that disciplines." (Prov. 6:23) If a person was allowed to follow his basic nature, whether good or bad, he would not be able to separate himself from his youthful behavior when he reached the full maturity, as it is written, "Train a lad in the way he ought to go; he will not swerve from it even in his old age." (Prov. 22:6) Thus, a person acquires great benefit and merit for himself (by accepting criticism when he is young.) Because of this Solomon advises us to offer reproof to a young person with 'the rod of discipline,' "if folly settles in the heart of a lad, the rod of discipline will remove it." (Prov. 22:15) This means that even if the folly has attached itself to his heart and he has become accustomed to acting in this fashion for many years, do not despair and say, 'There is no way to make him improve,' for as long as he is a lad and the rod of discipline is used, he can remove it. By disciplining him little by little, the reproof will eventually enter his heart. When the word of the disciplinarian is soft so and offered with constancy it will eventually make an impression on the one who is disciplined just as drops of water which are soft and pleasing eventually leave a hole in a rock (upon which the water drips). But if a person despairs and does not try to offer a young person reproof, it is as if he hates him, as it is stated: "He who spares the rod, hates his son; but he who loves him disciplines him early," (Prov. 14:23) The Midrash interprets this verse: "He who spares the rod, hates his son," refers to King David, while "He who loves him, disciplines him early," refers to Jacob, teaching that one who withholds discipline in the end will cause his children to follow evil company. We find this to be the case with Abraham who spoiled Ishmael and eventually he followed evil company…similarly Isaac spoiled Esau so that he left his father to follow evil company… David spoiled Adoniyah and Abshalom causing them to follow evil company… "He who loves him disciplines him early" refers to Abraham in the case of Isaac and Isaac in the case of Jacob. Similarly because Jacob disciplined his sons, there was no unworthy sons among them. Because he was a wise disciplinarian and the sons were attentive to him they became like refined gold made into earrings and they were truly the children of their father's legacy.

In terms of willingness to accept rebuke, this theme not only pervades Sefer Melachim but also serves as its literary “bookends.” The Sefer begins by mentioning that David HaMelech never rebuked Adoniyahu (Melachim I 1:6). We hear this each year during the Haftarah of Parashat Chayei Sarah.

עצבון: nur ein geistiger und im Gemüte zu empfindender Schmerz. Wenn es einmal von einem körperlichen Schmerz vorkommt, so ist es auf die in Geist und Gemüt übergehende Folge zu beziehen. Rad: עצב, das durch צ modifizierte עזב, verlassen, also ein mit Widerwillen, durch Zwang, Härte, Gewalt geschehendes Lassen. עצב daher das Gefühl, wenn wir etwas aufgeben müssen, das wir gerne behalten oder erlangt hätten: Entsagung, Verzichtleistung. ולא עצבו אביו מימיו (Kön. I. 1, 6). David hatte seinen Sohn nie an eine Entsagung gewöhnt, nie eine Entsagung von ihm gefordert. ויתעצב אל לבו. (Bereschit 6, 6): Gott fühlte — menschlich gesprochen — daß er das Menschengeschlecht aufgeben, ihm entsagen müsse. — Zu Adam hatte Gott schon gesprochen: בעצבון תאכלנה. Mit dem Worte עצבון tritt der Mensch für eine geraume Zeit in eine ganz neue Stellung. Bis dahin hatte der Mensch Entsagung nicht gekannt. Außer dem Menschen kennt auch kein Wesen עצבון, kein Geschöpf stellt seine Ansprüche weiter als sie befriedigt werden können. Für den Menschen stimmt aber jetzt die Natur nicht mehr wie früher mit seinen Wünschen überein, er muss ihr alles abringen und nur durch Entsagung, durch Einsetzung eines Gutes, einer Freude kann er das andere erlangen. — Merkwürdiger Weise werden auch Götzen durch ein Wort von dieser rad. bezeichnet: עצבים. Die Menschen, die ja eigentlich nur sich selbst die Nötigung zur Entsagung verdanken, vergaßen den im Menschen liegenden Ursprung und glaubten sich von feindlichen Mächten umgeben, die ihnen den Schmerz der Entsagung auferlegten und Freude an der Qual der Menschen hätten; diese Mächte heißen deshalb עצבים, Versagende, und אלילים, Verneinende, immer "nein!" sagende Götter. — Also: "zum Weibe aber hatte er gesprochen, deine Entsagung und deine Empfängnis werde ich noch größer sein lassen". Schon daß die Anrede an die Frau nicht mit כי עשית זאת eingeleitet ist, beweist, daß es bloß eine Fortsetzung des zuvor an Adam Gerichteten ist. Von dem עצבון des Mannes ist das Weib größtenteils frei. Nicht es hat im Schweiße des Angesichts Brot zu erwerben. Gleichwohl wird seine Entsagung eine noch größere. Das ganze weibliche Leben vom frühesten Mädchenalter an, ist ein Leben voller Aufopferung. Entsagung für andere, und nun noch gar הרונך, wo das Weib mit der Aufopferung seiner eigenen Existenz mit seinem eigenen Fleisch und Blut Beitrag wird für eine neue Menschensprosse! בעצב תלדי בנים, es gibt keine größere Glückseligkeit für das Weib als Kinder zu haben, und diese höchste Glückseligkeit ist nur mit der höchsten Entsagung zu erkaufen.